– [Man] First step is finding
the articles you want to copy. – What do you mean copy? – Basically all you’re doing
is finding other people’s articles and rewriting them
with a new clickbait headline and a conservative twist. Send me your headlines for approval before you publish them. – Do you need to read my
articles before I publish them? – No, what really matters
is the headline, okay? Content itself is not that important. – Hello? – [Dad] You wanna move to Los Angeles? – I’m trying to be a screen writer. LA is where you have to be. – Great. You know, I’ve always wanted
you to pursue your dreams and not settle for less. But you’re gonna need a plan. And I assume you’ll need
help from me for the money? – Yeah, I will. – Well, as you know, I’m
more than willing to help but I can’t just give you money for free and allow you to lay around
all day like you usually do. We need to make a deal. – Okay. – Here are your conditions: You’re gonna write a log every single day tell me what you did that day and what you plan to do the next day. – Alright. – You’re gonna have to apply
to 30 jobs a day every day. – 30 a day? I mean, you know I have
to write cover letters for every one of those, right? – And you’re going to
make two new contacts every single day, and you’re
gonna respond to texts and emails in under 10 minutes. You gotta make finding a
job your full time job. No more uber driving. – Well my plan was to
get a copywriting job while I work on my screenplay. – No, no, no. You didn’t go to school
to be a copywriter. – Well you just don’t
get screenwriting jobs. – You can if you put your heart into it. I didn’t spend $60,000 a year on school for you to drive for
uber or do copywriting. Here’s what you need to do: get up every morning at 7
a.m. and clean your room, and then send me a photo
of your clean room, then go to the gym and send
me a photo of you at the gym. – Okay. I mean, but, theoretically
let’s say I make a new friend and he invites me out
but going out would mean I don’t get to finish
all the stuff on my log. Is that okay? – No. Absolutely not. Here’s the other thing. I don’t want to be the
only one checking in on you so you’ll go see a therapist
and I’ll talk to them after each one of your sessions. – That doesn’t seem legal. – Well I’m not gonna
ask them what you said I’m just going to make sure you went. I’m not that invasive. – Mhmm. – No, don’t mhmm me. Do we have a deal? (phone rings) – Maxine Waters says we
need to take Trump out. How about, watch how Maxine Waters subtly urges her followers
to kill the president. Hillary calls Trump thin-skinned. Hillary says Trump can’t be president because he has a skin condition. Ableist. Google didn’t make a
logo for memorial day. How about, Google did something disgusting to hurt homeless veterans on memorial day. Liberals punched a gay
Hispanic Trump supporter. How about a see how liberals assaulted this gay Hispanic Trump supporter. It is disgusting. I think I’m good at this. That’s right, I’m totally
financially independent. I don’t need your money anymore. – Okay, but your therapist told me that– – Enough with the therapist dad. I don’t want your help anymore. I want to do this on my own. – You’re happy being
what, a fake news writer? – Yes. No. I’ll do more eventually. It’s good for now. – You’ve been doin’ good so far but that last one with the
gay Hispanic Trump supporter could use some work. The word “gay” for example,
maybe it would be better to leave that out of the headline. They are not particularly
fond of gay people, or Hispanics for that matter. You know, with all that’s goin’ on with Trump and illegals. However, if it had been
a veteran, hint hint, now that is something you would definitely want to throw in there. What you wrote would’ve been
better for my liberal page. – Wait, you have a liberal page? Can I switch to that one? – Really? Well, we don’t
need any other writers for that one right now. But you know, if space
opens up I’ll let you know. (grunts) – Hey I was thinking you and I could do something fun tonight? – Don’t you have a log
to write or something? – Nope, I got a job. – Oh yeah, what was that again? – News writer. – Are you smart enough
to be a news writer? What’s it called? – Oh, it’s called… It’s liberal. – Okay. Well, I’m glad you’re not
writing conservative propaganda. But you really should try to be objective, not just write for one side. What’s the website? Can I read one of your articles? – Yeah. But before we do that. Can you tell me about that
doxxing group that you’re in? – Oh yeah well, there’s
been a scourge on the planet for quite some time now: fake news pages. First they caused Brexit. Then they got Donald Hitler elected and now they’re doing their
part to create a more divided, hateful America. – Why do you care? You can’t even vote here. – Unlike you, I care about things that are greater than myself. – So does fake just mean conservative? – No! Fake means untrue, like this article. This article suggests that
the Quran promotes terrorism. Not only is that untrue but it’s bigoted and can cause violence. It’s fake. – Can’t this just be someone’s opinion? – No! It’s untrue! It’s objectively untrue! I mean, by that logic you could
say that the Bible promotes genocide and sexism. – But I thought fake news meant
like the actually said facts that are false, like numerical facts. – Of course, Kelly Anne’s
“alternative facts” are false, like when she lies about
inauguration crowd sizes, but being factually wrong isn’t just saying incorrect numbers, it’s about taking things out of context omitting facts, only telling
one side of the story to mislead the public. – Doesn’t all news do that? Like recently I was reading
a Breitbart article– – Why the fuck were you reading that white supremacist garbage!? – It’s not that bad. – Imagine if a minority were
to hear you just casually talking about reading Breitbart. – I’m sorry it just
came up in my research. – Why would that come up in your research? – Because…I was researching
how not to write an article.